Is This Really The End?
by xbutterflied
Summary: Once again, another please let GSR live on stories!


_That was it, the divorce papers had landed on my doormat, I never wanted this day to arrive, I thought that some where deep down, Gil would change his mind and come back to me, to say he cares enough to give up travelling and set up a home with me properly. Since we got married, he's been back to Vegas five times, FIVE TIMES! I've lived here for nearly three years and he's hardly visited, he always expected me to run to him, go to where he was, if I wasn't working, I was travelling to see him, yes we'd call, and before things got difficult we would skype call, we were surviving but it was just too hard. Marriage is about give and take, and it seemed I was giving and he was taking all the time._

Throwing the unopened envelope on the desk she ran her fingers through her hair, and sighed, she wasn't ready to see it officially in black and white. Leaving them sitting there, she walked into the kitchen, pouring herself a glass of water sipping at it as she walked into the bedroom, her muscles aching after the double shift she had just pulled, she knew that DB, Greg and especially Nick was keeping his eye on her, which she did think was nice, but to be honest she just wanted space, now the free time she used to spend travelling had been spent on overtime in the lab, Sara was ready for a nice hot soak and then at least eight hours in bed, asleep hopefully, if she could, but since that phone call saying he thought it would be for the best if they divorce, she had been suffering insomnia again.

Filling the bath, she added her favourite lavender scented salts then stripped out of her work clothes and slipped into the bath, and groaned as the water soothed her muscles. Laying back, thoughts flooding her mind she felt tears rolling down her cheeks, when did her life become one big mess? Why had this all happened, they had been happy in Paris, then she spoiled it all by coming back to Vegas, she wasn't feeling the whole trophy wife, she needed to work, the call from Conrad had come at the perfect time, and they had both agreed that they would make it work, it was only meant to be temporary, six months at the most but here she was three years later, still in Las Vegas.

Wiping away the tears, she just let more fall until she felt the water around her become cold. Then she got out, dried herself off and looked at her finger where the ring used to sit. She sighed, pulling on one of his undershirts he had left behind, then a pair of her pyjama's shorts. She sat down on the bed and ran her fingers through her hair, with a sigh she tore her eyes away from the photo beside her bed, one of them on their wedding day, it hadn't been traditional, they had done it in Costa Rica not long after he had joined her there, but they were happy, he was holding her close, his arms wrapped around her, it was perfect.

She was drawn out of her memories by the ringing of her cell, cursing that it could be work, or the mental hospital her mom lived at she picked it up and without looking at the caller ID she spoke. "Sidle."

"Hi, it's me, Sorry to disturb you, but I received my copy of the papers today, and I was just wondering if you had checked yours yet?" Gilbert Grissom was on the other end of the line. Sara's heart twisted once again at the sound of his voice, how could he keep doing this to her.

"No I haven't had the chance yet, I just worked a double, and to be honest, I don't want to even think about those papers." She was refusing to use the word divorce; her heart wanted him to be there with her forever.

"Oh, well there seems to be a problem with mine, it says we own some real estate in Norway, I don't know I don't understand it but could you check yours see if they have made the same mistake?" He asked, his voice remaining neutral as he spoke out.

"Hold on, I'll go check." She sighed, not wanting to make conversation because she knew it would hurt, and that was something she was trying to get past. Walking through to her desk and picked up the envelope, her cell balanced on her shoulder as she opened it.

He could hear the gasp in her breath as she began to read.

_My Dearest Sara, _

_Words have never come easily to me, I'm a scientist, not a man from the heart, but I knew that day you walked into my seminar, that I would spend the rest of my life with you. I know you were expecting divorce papers, but honey, I couldn't do it. I couldn't face myself if I was to hurt you so bad. _

_ 'To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.' _

_Before you I used to live like that, but you broke the walls down, you were the only woman to ever get into my heart, and you are the only woman I will ever love. Remember that. _

_It's been said, that you can't live with them but you can't live without them. That is not true. _

Sara had to turn the page; Gil's handwriting had already filled one side and was spread over to another sheet.

_I can live with you, honey it's all I want now, you are the only one for me, no more travelling without you. Never. _

_And the second part, Is true, I can't live without you, I've tried and it's too hard, I need my beautiful, sexy leggy brunette next to me, no matter what we are doing, whether it be sleeping or taking Hank walks in he park, I never want to be away from you again. _

The rest of the sheet was blank, so she turned the page once again, this time a huge smile came to her lips, because in big letters, he had written.

_ I love you Sara Sidle-Grissom. _

She turned to the final sheet which she gasped at again.

_Go to the door honey, for you will find your future waiting for you. _

Sara dropped the four sheets of paper to the desk and made her way to the door, she could see him standing there holding his cell phone to his ear, looking out on to the neighbors garden, she opened the door, hanging up her cell and sliding it onto the end table as she looked at her husband. Her brain trying to figure out if her eyes were deceiving her, but then he turned to her and smiled, a smile came on her face and they fell into an embrace. Clinging to each other for all they could. Yes they both knew they had a lot of work ahead but right now they were here together and that was all that mattered.

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A/N I had to write this out, hopeful as ever, if you'd like me to continue this please let me know (: Reviews are very loved! (:


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